Saturday, 5 January 2013

First blog of the year!!

Ello, ello ello!

I've been thinking about how i was going to write this blog for quite a while, and it's taken me longer than expected because I just don't get very much time to concentrate (or even think) properly these days, so I decided that I'd just start throwing words down and see what happens.

Well, my 'new start' hasn't quite started yet - REALLY quite annoyed about that, all because my stupid housing accociation were two months late coming to repair the ceiling on my stairs and landing that started to fall down. We had about 50 million books on the middle bit of the stairs, which I had to move for them to come and replace the ceiling, I stacked them all against the wall in my bedroom, but then in the wait, we had damp problems behind the books, so I had to move them all back onto the stairs, treat the damp, and move them back into the was actually more complicated than that too, but I really can't be bothered explaining anymore! Now they've repaired the ceiling, I had to spend most of the next day clearing up all the mess that was made. Consequently, this whole business took quite a bit of time, and with Jamies birthday and Christmas, I haven't managed to get everything done when I wanted it to.

In other news, I'm realising that I very probably have Aspergers myself too! After all the research I've done and learning that girls show it differently to boys (Jamie shows a lot of Aspie traits too) and after my (failed) CBT which made me learn more about myself, I'm pretty sure I'm an Aspie too.
So this is why I'm utterly RUBBISH with social situation, so I just wanted to explain to those who know me, I can't really do groups, I haven't got a clue, I start losing the conversation, I don't know what to say or when to say it, I usually end up doing something weird or rude, so for everyones sake, I generally avoid groups.
It also explains why I need routine, and another reason why I get so overwhelmed with life. It's kind of cool finding out all this about myself. I'm realising that theres a really good reason for all my weirdness and why I've always felt that I don't fit in anywhere. I do get quite lonely, but because people stress me out, I don't mind being alone most of the time. And I really hate to say this, but this is where facebook has really helped! : / With facebook, I can communicate the way I want to without fear of being strange, I can comment in my own time, I can socialise without the confusion and stress. I've also made some really lovely friends on facebook, I love my facebook friends :)

OK, back to home education!
We are all eager to start doing stuff again now, Amelia, Jamie and Alex are all brimming with energy and possibilities, I just hope I can be the mum they need, i still haven't got the support I need butI am much more positive and determined now.
Alex has finally settled down again after the upheaval of the room swap, it took 2 and a half months, but now he's quite a happy little boy again, I'm so proud of him, he's such a funny and quirky character, it's so good to have him back to normal again!
Both Alex and Jamie have been doing some english and maths over the last couple of days having cleared away all of the christmas things and revealing the work books that had been forgotten about. Alex was also counting all the money he could find, and adding it with other little piles of coins he found in his room, after showing him long addition, he understood it perfectly. He also started reading again, went straight in at the highest level of reading books we have, he was only on level 3-4 a few months ago when he last read a book, I was thinking he would find it hard, but he had no problem at all!! It's crazy that without reading ANY books, he's still improving! it's like magic! ;)
Jamie is becoming more and more aware of the realities of life. She's starting to see the flaws in society, she's getting morals and is a bit of a little freedom fighter, she reminds me a lot of myself when I was her age!
After a bit of a rough time between herself and me, we've found a way of dealing with arguments; we write little notes to eachother expressing our points of view. It's so much better than shouting, we calm down a lot quicker and things get resolved quicker. We get on pretty well these days :)

Amelia is becoming quite a little character now, copying Alex's craziness, which isn't always a good thing...she's got so much confidence, yet still very chilled out, although she does have her mad comic moments, especially in the evening, which really makes us laugh, the other night, after hearing it on the TV, she said "You suck!" !!! funny but we probably shouldn't have laughed at that one!

I will try and do blog once a week now, gotta get back on it, I feel the time is right, I've just gotta find the time to squeeze it in!

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