Wednesday, 18 July 2012


I finally get to sit down at half nine! I've had a really stressful day today :( I have got SOOO much to try to cram into 2 days. I can't handle having a stressful life. It all went really wrong this afternoon when Alex wanted to read me a book, again, I think he only wanted to do it so that he could get a sweet - I'm really regretting starting this now because he's turned it into one of his rituals, and if I try and change it, he gets upset. He started reading the book, I had 10 minutes until I had to leave to get Jamie from school, and he was struggling so much, finding it really hard to concentrate on each word, it's weird, he knows how to read, but it's like he can't stop looking at everything else on the page. It was taking ages, he finished reading it at ten to three, and then Amelia did a number 2!! So I went into mad-rush mode, tried to get Alex to help get things ready, like get his shoes on, shut the back door, but because I was stressed, Alex just shut down! so I was really late leaving the house, then on the way down the road he was lagging behind me, trying to get his jacket on back-to-front, but he couldn't zip it up, so he was asking me to stop and help him, but I was really trying to get to school - already 5 minutes late, and I kept asking him to put his jacket on the right way round, but he insisted it being on backwards!!! He just didn't understand that we needed to hurry up, he just didn't get it at all. Thinking back now if I hadn't been so stressed, I should've just zipped it up backwards for him :( stupid hindsight.....
After finally getting there, it started pouring down with rain, we were all getting soaked, and Alex insisted on stopping for all the snails and trying to balance them on a little skinny stick, which they kept falling off of so he had to walk really slowly, in the pouring rain!!

Anyway, it just carried on being stressful then, we managed to make some cupcakes to give to Jamies teachers and the lollipop lady.

Earlier, before it all went horribly wrong, some DVD's that I'd ordered for Alex had arrived, it was a 'Mister Maker' boxset, Alex watched a couple of episodes and painted a really cool picture of a palm tree in a sunset, but I still can't photos on here!!!

And Alex did the most amazing thing this morning....on the way back from grandads (I was going to cut his hedge but it was raining) we stopped off at Waitrose, and as soon as I'd put the shopping on the conveyor belt, Ales said that he really needed the toilet, he's never been in the toilets at waitrose, he's always been too scared, we were at the till that was right at the other end of the shop, the furthest away from the toilets. I said to Alex that he'd either have to hold it, or he can go by himself, and pointed to the toilets that were in the distance.....he thought about it for a few seconds, and then just went on his own!!! He just went to use a toilet that he's never used before, ALL BY HIMSELF!!!! He has NEVER done that before! Jamie wouldn't even had done it! I was absolutely amazed!!

But I'm so gutted that the rest of the day was so horrible.I think it was me, I'm just feeling quite overwhelmed with all of whats going on with Alex, all with whats going on with Jamie, and everything else that going on.

My partner is probably going to get the sack soon. His bosses are being so unreasonable, he works for a grounds maintenance company and it sounds like they are going under, they are expecting my partner to work nearly 2 hours extra, unpaid everyday, and if he doesn't, or if he can't finish his days rota (like if it's raining too much....) he's out,  But, He has starting his own gardening business, got a few customers already, but he's having to work 7 days a week. It's really stressful waiting to get the letter saying he's lost his job :(
So if anyone who knows me, needs a regular gardener, let me know! :)

OK, I have to go and try and get Alex to stop throwing his toys across his room now, it's 10pm!!

Hope tomorrow is a better day......

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